She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
of course. lets lasso hookers.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize