so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I’m so poor I’m filling a flask with vodka and bringing it to the bar.
Randomize
