doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
so let's talk penis.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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