meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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