She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
Randomize
