at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
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