I feel like my sweat is 40 proof right now
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
The bender is in full force. After 2 bloody mary's at breakfast we are now drinking vodka redbull "as a precaution" so we will stay awake for the club tonight.
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
