I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
