She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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