Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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