what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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