2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
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