No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
We don't watch enough power rangers
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
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