You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
