Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
nutella sex= disaster
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
