I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
We are two peas in an std pod
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Dude, running 15 min late.
Let's play a game, you pay for all the drinks I can finish before you get here. Go.
Randomize
