I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
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