Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
