Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
