I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
Randomize
