1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
