He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
