Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
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