We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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