awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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