I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Randomize