Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
