your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
All hell broke loose. When the police showed up, this kid somehow haggled with a cop to let him pee in public. I'm convinced he could talk the panties off of a nun
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Randomize
