Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
