Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Randomize
