i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Randomize
