Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
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