Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
