Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize