I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
