420 ftw
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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