is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Quick, to the slutcave!
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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