Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
The feeling are messing with the penis
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
Randomize
