Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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