i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
