In the future we'll all be gay
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Randomize