C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
Randomize
