I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize