I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
