OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
You don't make any sense
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