You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
