this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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