bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
