this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
