O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
